​My dear Margot, I am sorry

As parents, we think that the second child is less of a struggle than the first one. We think that we know it all. And because the first one survived, the second surely will. So we act differently with second one.  We are more relaxed, way more !
I can hear myself saying: “nah she will be fine.” We are less worried about eventual bumps, sleeping routine and food. It does not mean that we love them less, I think that we just realized that babies are tougher than we thought. However, sometimes we forget that they are just babies …

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Margot,
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You are a wonderful baby and we take it for granted. You rarely cry, you sleep well, eat whatever we give you and you are always happy. Your laugh is the best! you can make an entire crowd laugh with you. You are also more (but wayyyy more) advanced than your sister at the same age. You started crawling at 7 months and you nicely play by yourself. However, sometimes we just forget that you are just a baby and I find myself talking to you like I do to your 3 year old sister. But Margot, you are only 8 months old, a 8 month old baby. When your sister was your age, we use to treat her like a baby and were always watching her back. We don’t do it with you, and for that, I am deeply sorry.
 
I am sorry that I do not cook only organic fresh veggie purees like I used to for your sister
I am sorry that I do not baby talk to you like I used to with Lise
I am sorry that I am sometimes out of diapers although that never happened with Lise
I am sorry that I wait longer to change your soggy diapers than I used to with Lise
I am sorry that I leave you to play alone while I was always hands-on with Lise
I am sorry that I do not stressed out when you bump your head like I used to with Lise
I am sorry that I change you on the carpet while I always changed Lise on the changing table
I am sorry that your routine is more approximate than Lise’s one at the same age
I am sorry that when we go out I do not take a diaper bag with everything in it while I would never go out without it when Lise was a baby
I am sorry that you wear your sister’s old clothes
I am sorry that sometimes you go second because I want to make sure that your sister does not feel left behind
I am sorry that I leave you to overcome obstacles by yourself while I use to clear Lise’s path
I am sorry that you have to share your toys while Lise did not have to
I am sorry that Lise chokes you instead of hugs, pushes you instead of lays you down and suffocates you instead of kisses you
… I am sorry you tasted your first ice cream at 7 months and your sister didn’t until she was 3 years old
 
Margot, we love you as much as we love your sister. You are our bubble of joy and everyday I try to be a better mom for you … my dear baby.
 
Being the second child is difficult. We know that because your dad and I are also second kids.

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